**Crazy People Side Note** Some how we always, ALWAYS get the short end of the stick on the buses. This time we got sat behind the California princess (who spent $400 on necklaces for her friends – she ordered each one, individually, on the bus) (Later she was even able to try to make it seem like living in Cali was cooler then Switzerland – Lady, it may not be the COOLEST place to live but it beats the heck outta Cali!) and in front of crazy dad/grandpa (I’m not sure which) who wouldn’t discipline his stupid kid who couldn’t say 2 words without whiiiiining them, thought it was a fun game to kick the back of my seat while listening to the her freaking singing camel that she HAD to have (I watched her whine until she got it), and several times was able to find the one stray hair on my head and rip it out. This guy also complained at the top of his lungs that the guy next to him was snoring too loud for him to sleep – but only after his wife/mother/daughter/mistress (again, I don’t know) went on, and on, and on, and on for 45 minutes about her stupid effing key chain. Because they couldn’t sleep no one else was allowed to either. At least the snoring guy got a little relief from their freaking blabber. Probably, needless to say, we were ready to get off the bus at the end of the day.
Back to the story. Our first stop was the Pyrimids of Giza (the last of the 7 old world wonders standing)– right outside of Ciaro. Again, it was a little weird to drive through this old, run down city and three seconds later, THERE THEY ARE! To think that these were made with nothing more then hands and manual labor…the wheel had not been invented yet so they didn’t even have that luxury.
The experience was slightly tainted by the hundreds of ‘merchants’ that attacked you the second you got of the coach until the second you got back on. The pyramids of Giza are really a complex of 5 pyramids. There are three massive ones – for Grandfather, Father, and Son (all of nobility) and the 2 little ones were for the women of the family.
The pyramids were not built by slaves as some people think. Egypt at the time didn’t have slaves. They were built by government workers. When a new king was crowned they would begin working on his tomb – when he died they were done, finished or not. So, these tombs, being as big as they are, makes them amazing. They think it took about 30 years to construct the biggest one. This grouping of pyramids has never been excavated and there is no way into any of them.
We also got a little history on the mummification process. All of the organs were removed from the body through a 7 millimeter slit near the kidney and dehydrated. All of the organs, except for the heart, are placed in jars and buried next to the body. The body is also dehydrated and then soaked for about 2 weeks in a salt bath. (Poorer people were also soaked in salt baths but not for as long. Salt used to be a very expensive and only the nobility and rich could afford it. That is one reason why the mummies that are still around are of noble people – another is that a lot of the less wealthy were just buried in the sand and animals would eat their corpse.) The heart was returned to the body then the body was wrapped with linen (other fabrics had not been discovered yet). The whole process took 70 days.
The reason that the pyramids contain (or at least used to) so many valuables was because the thought was that these ‘people’ lived on forever in their pyramid and they deserved to have all of their possessions with them. The hieroglyphics and beautiful wall art had many purposes:
1. They showed the soul (that had the ability to leave the pyramid to visit the living world and return whenever it wanted) who it belonged to. The reason the people on the walls all look contorted is because walking to one side meant the person was of nobility but a profile of the face would not be enough for the soul to recognize; so the upper body had to shift forward so the full face could be seen.
2. The Egyptians believed in magic. They believed that if everything was painted on the walls of the tomb magic would make it last for all eternity. That’s why most of the pictures are of food and other necessities. By painting fruits, vegetables, meats, fish, etc on the walls magic would allow that to be enough to sustain the soul forever.
3. They also told stories; both of what the people did during their live but also as entertainment for the afterlife.
After the pyramids we took a very short bus ride to the sphinx. The sphinx was only used for the mummification process and therefore only for 70 days. The sphinx was carved out of limestone and not built like the pyramids were. The sphinx has to body of a lion but the head of a pharaoh (that reminds me, all day I had that church camp song running through my head…’Oh, pharaoh, pharaoh, oh baby let my people go. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!’) Our tour guide gave us an explanation of why it was built like that but I was too busy taking pictures of it to really pay attention.
Our next stop was probably the most terrible experience I’ve ever had in my life. We went to a country club (yeah, even Egyptians have country clubs – it’s the only place in the country that has grass) and had to ride around the sand dunes in Jeeps. Not just any Jeeps mind you, these were like 1970’s hillbilly-fied Jeeps. Kyle and I sat in the back-back sideways (that was my stupid decision – the other people were old and I didn’t think they could climb up there). Sand is worse than gravel too. On sand you get the bumpy like you do with gravel but you are also prone to sliding around like you were on icy cement. Then, you’re going over these sharp hills at 50 mph (that just reaffirmed that Kyle will not be getting his and her dune buggies – he can get his and his-brother dune buggies or even his and his-second wife dune buggies (although I don’t know how he’ll be able to afford his and his-second wife dune buggies once you add in taxes and repairs and maintenance and alimony…)) At one point they guy (who wouldn’t talk to us otherwise) told us to get out of the Jeep to take pictures of the pyramids – finally we all got out and started taking pictures and he shoved us all back in. Kyle was barely able to get the back door shut before the guy floored it and sped off up and down these freaking hills. My skull is still bruised from where the guy hit a hill too hard and all flew out of our seats by about 6 inches. That was fine for every one else but we only had 1/2 an inch of clearance. My sunglasses were on the top of my head and just about snapped in two. When I howled in pain (not on purpose, just a reaction) the guy just grunted like it was my fault.Then we had to get on these freaking camels. I swear my camel was lopsided and had the shivers. I have now confirmed (again) that I don’t ride animals. I hated my camel riding experience and Kyle insisted on making it as miserable as possible. He was always trying to take my picture with a look of terror on my face (he kept trying to get me to turn around and look at him)…luckily lunch was dang good and Kyle bought me a Diet Coke for being so mean to me.
After lunch we headed to a step pyramid (yes, it is different from the Giza pyramids). This pyramid was built to look like it had steps in it – they other ones just look like they do from thousands of years of weather eroding them. The neat thing about this pyramid is that whoever was buried in this tomb didn’t want his organs buried with him and instead wanted them buried a few meters away at the same depth (90 feet). So his crew dug a hole to put his organs in but you can’t really just throw a several ton sarcophagus down a 90 foot hole and expect it to stay intact. So, they filled that hole with sand and then dug an identical hole right next to it. They placed the sarcophagus on top of the sand and then dug several holes to connect the 2 identical holes (if I had a picture I could show you). The weight of the sarcophagus pushed the sand into the empty whole and eventually the sarcophagus was 90 feet underground (sarcophagus). Again, these guys didn’t have a wheel but they could come up with this idea – wow!
Last, we went to the Papyrus Paper Institute…not an institute in any way. It was a souvenir shop where they sold paintings done on papyrus paper. Of course we bought one (Kyle thinks it’s only being hung up around Christmas time – I, on the other hand, have not actually decided when and where it will be hung). The sales guy kept trying to have our names or some lame saying written in hieroglyphics on it. I’m sorry, but hieroglyphics, especially when done in 3 minutes, look cheesy and really take away from a beautiful piece of work. It’s like wearing tennis shoes with a business suit – you know it serves a purpose but it still looks pretty tacky (I would know – I did it for 4 years when I lived and worked downtown). Next we STRUGGLED to find a magnet and finally just bought one. We were able to find a little better one by the boat but it still didn’t meet my criteria. Oh well...We had another 2.5 hours on the bus to get back to Alexandria. It was a LOOONG 2.5 hours with the crazies in front and behind us…but we ALL made it back in one piece. We immediately went to dinner and then to sleep – we were ready to call it a day.
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